I Trust My Wife

That's really what it comes down to. We're doing a lot better lately. See we've been a tiny bit distant for the past two years.

Not in the way that you're probably thinking.

Not in a way that most people would even notice. But I'm kinda sensitive to that sort of thing and we're very, very close. She's my best friend.

It's cheezy I know but she really is. More than she was ever a girlfriend or even more than she is my wife she is my best friend. So when we get even the tiniest bit distant I notice. then because I'm a big sissy GIRL I get all freaky about it. For the most part it hasn't been a big deal. I've been stressed at work for one reason or another for 2-4 years. Sucks but true, more on that another time. She's been getting stressed off and on for about 2 years now. Between that and kids, now a failing economy, my parents and her parents failing health. It takes it's toll.

We still do well, about a year ago someone asked us how long we were married and were completely surprised when we told them 7 years (8 now) because they said we acted like newlyweds. grshck.

Anywho then this whole religion thing happened and I created more stress. I've really been trying but I was handling this religion thing poorly when it started. Then I started saying things that distanced her. then we really were distant. Now remember how I'm a big sissy girl? So what that means is that I overreact when it comes to emotional things. When I over react in this situation I get all clingy.

The kind of distance I've been feeling I've felt before. Very shortly before the woman I was with and I separated. So when she says "We're fine, we're not going to get a divorce or anything." I had a little trouble with it. "We're fine, we're not breaking up." has been said to me before. Both time subsequently followed up with something like "I was wrong" a few months later.

But I trust my wife. I'm not saying either of them were lying to me. I'm saying they were lying to themselves. Don't think I'm blameless here. I reacted the same way all three times. I got really really realy smotheringly clingy. Which of course pushes the woman a little further from you (clingy guys take this as a lesson.) What's different is the first two times this results in a complete panick and ultimately a failure. But I trust my wife. So when she says we're fine she's not worried I believe her. What I trust is that she's being honest enough with herself. And more importantly I believe her when she says that she trusts me. So in the end I just explained all that to her, about the clingy, and the way I feel about her faith and it's relationship to mine.

Much much more on that later.